Powerful Book

IT'S earth shattering and downright scary to suddenly be found a widow at any age.  This very young mother of thirty one had to face that reality along with two preschoolers.   And you can't help but shake your head in disbelief and ask 'why oh why'. 

Meet Tricia Lott Williford!

THROUGH her book: Let's Pretend We're Normal: Adventures in Rediscovering How to Be a Family is a redemptive story of pure grace.  A very young widow of two boys and how to get back up and just do the hard things.  She’s very funny and real and widows or not as mothers of young children – we can relate to her day to day living.  Her story makes you savor every day with your children and appreciate your life just a bit more.  You can be crying one moment and laugh out loud the next as she takes you through her life. 

Through her story, one can learn a lot about family, courage, and forgiveness.  She’s learned many lessons and having the family support that God provided is extraordinary. I highly recommend this book to anyone and experience life in her shoes.

"I received this book from Blogging for Books for this review."

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Book Review: Finding Your Way Back To God

To say that I love the book is an understatement.  I’ve written all over the pages and shouted Yes and Yes over and over because the authors Dave and Jon Ferguson have posed and guided me to questions that I did not know how to ask or dare to in the book Finding Your Way Back to God.

The authors boldly ask the reader to take a wager in finding god. In so doing, made the following five observations:

1. Awakening to Longing: “There’s got to be more.” – “God, if you are real, make yourself real to me. Awaken in me the ability to see that you are what’s missing from my life.” (Romans 1:18-20?)

2. Awakening to Regret: “I wish I could start over.” - “God, if you real, make yourself real to me. Awaken in me the possibility that with you I could start over again.” (1 John 1:8-9)

3. Awakening to Help: “I can’t do this on my own.” – “God, if you are real, make yourself real to me. Awaken in me the willingness to turn toward you for help.” (1 Pet 5:5)

4. Awakening to Love: “God loves me deeply after all.” – “God, if you are real, make yourself real to me. Awaken in me the awareness that I am your unconditionally loved child.” (John 3:16)

5. Awakening to Life: “Now this is living.”- “God, if you are real, make yourself real to me. Awaken in me the confidence that I can live a brand-new life.” (2 Cor 5:170

And the back story if the parable of the prodigal son.  I guarantee you will never read the story the same way again.  It was eye opening to see how they pull out so much truth from the story that will lead the reader right into the arms of a loving Father.

The book can help anyone at any stages on their spiritual journey or even non believer as many of the stories shared in the book inform us.  Also, included is a 30 day study guide to go along as one wrestles and dialogues with God.

"I received this book from Blogging for Books for this review."

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Bible Study: ANYTHING

UNBELIEF - a word that I am well acquainted it and at the same time cannot believe my unbelief. If someone does not believe in God then who or what else is there to believe in?  Interestingly enough, as a Christian, I do not read the Bible and fight against the truth.  

I believe the Bible
I believe in God's Word
I believe God is real 

But that begs the question: what's the problem? 
I wrestle with the idea of surrendering the throne of my life.  Not purposefully.  I don't dare point a finger at God and say I won't let you reign. But my behavior and actions tell a different story.  It is the crossroad that I am standing at right now asking the Lord to pry open my heart and expose the root cause.

Anything Bible Study ask the question: What keeps you from surrendering it all to God?
It is simply fear. Again they are all rooted together and intertwined and I can only do one thing and that is cry out to God to rescue me, to open my eyes, to expose my false belief system.

Have your way Father in my life.  I wave the white flag of surrender.  

I will not hold anything back.  I will do ANYTHING.


See to it, brothers and sisters, that none of you has an evil, unbelieving heart that forsakes the living God. Hebrews 3:12 NET

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Be the Message Devotional: A Thirty-Day Adventure in Changing the World Around You

As stated in the title, it a thirty day devotion dedicated to various topics that one can you for his or her quiet time.  The Authors walk you through the process and setting up the mood to receive not only the Word of God but to apply it.  I found the applications to be very helpful as they guide me on how to apply what I’ve read.

Each days starts with:

Open Yourself
Open God’s Word Open Your Mind
Open Your Heart
Open Your Life
Open Your Arms

Each of the above is thoroughly discussed as the authors expose you to God’s Word and let you come face to face with the applicable scriptures. Normally, I would read and move on but this process does make you ‘process’ the word and bring you face to face with how to put into practice throughout your day.  Whether it is creating list of names to pray for and the applications will go well beyond the 30 days. 

In the process, you will find new ways to live a more intentional life as well as impact those around 

you. I received this book from the Blogging for Books program in exchange for this review.

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Walking with God in the Sean of Motherhood

Walking with God in the Season of Motherhood could not have come at a better time in this season in my life.  It is a very well sound theological sound workbook that any mothers would benefit from on a daily basis.  This 11 week Bible study has the scriptures in the book and you can take it with you and do anytime.  The verses that she referenced in the book are so foundation and on point that I've had to write them down and reference them over and over.

On the days that life seems to spiral down and we don’t seem to see the purpose of it all with little ones or older children, the foundation in this book will help you to make it through.

Week 1: Understanding Your Purpose

Week 2: Knowing God's Word

Week 3: Entrusting Your Child to the Lord

Week 4: Ordering Your Home

Week 5: Reflecting the Heart of God

Week 6: Encouraging a Thankful Spirit

Week 7: Fighting Against Anxiety and Worry

Week 8: Letting Go of Harshness and Anger

Week 9: Training Hearts Through Discipline

Week 10: Guiding in Godliness by Example

Week 11: Recovering from Perfect Mom Syndrome (PMS)

From the first day and week of this book, I was sold.  Understanding Your Purpose, Week 1, if we grasp this reason, the very purpose for which God created us then our worldview is seen through God’s lens and life is approached from a total different viewpoint and life is approached differently.  I've been whispering this to myself over and over: Lord, help me to glorify you and bring glory to your great Name.

Needless to say that I would recommend this devotional book to any mothers and especially new moms that are in the trenches of raising the little ones entrusted to our care. If you have children, know someone with children, this will make a great gift.

I received this book free from the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review and the opinions I have expressed are my own. 

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A MUST READ: I Tried Until I Almost Died: From Anxiety and Frustration to Rest and Relaxation

 The title says it all. And while some people can relate to it - it is almost a guarantee that legalism has somehow not crept into our lives and grace has taken a backseat.

G R A C E

A simple word but yet a profound and beyond our understanding to grasp how powerful it is.  And Sandra has done just that as she waved the while flag an invited God to her rescue.  Grace is not for the ‘perfect’ people who have it all together – it a free gift to us by our loving and gracious Father.

If you are looking for a deep book theologically then you will have find another one but if you are in the trenches of life, leaving in fear, and frustration then she has something to share with you. She had me with the first few words in chapter 1: “From as far back as I can remember until age forty-two, I lived in a prison – not one built of bricks and mortar, but a mental prison, locked up by legalism, rules, and regulations”.

It’s as if she’s been reading my mail.  That described me and further in the book ended up realizing that I am been leaving a legalistic lifestyle trying to ‘do’ all that I can to please God but never measuring up. And frustration can quickly set in and because she has been there she’s able to hold our hands as we take the shackles off and come to the light of grace.

You will find her prayers that she prayed to God during the process of relying on God’s grace and letting Him take the wheels of her life and as she gently followed and continue to do so.

If you’d ask me if I was leaving under the law- would think you were crazy but God has graciously been taking the scales off where I do not have to perform to earn His love. 

Are you need in of some grace?  Do you need to return to living in God’s grace?  Are you tired of not measuring up?  Is peace lacking in your life?

Do yourself a favor and grab a copy of this book.  I promise you that you will not be the same person when you turn the last page.  Just like her life was transformed on that faithful January 2, 2012 – yours can too.  Let today be the day.

 “I received this book from the Blogging for Books program in exchange for this review.”

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Lent Challenge Day 1

Margaret Feinberg is hosting a 40 Day Lent Challenge (#LentChallenge) through the Gospel books.  And of the questions that she’s posing is:

What do I most need to read but least want to hear?

For me, it’s a sense that I need WAKE up and not live a life of complacency any longer.  There is too much at stake.  I need to WAKE and get in the fight and not be a bystander.  My heart cry is for Christ’s light to shine in my life and in the process radiate his light to others.

I think of the following passage: This is why it is said: "Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." Eph. 5:14.

The assigned reading for today was Matthew chapters 1-2. And I couldn’t help but focus on the names of the Child that was to be born as Matthew points us to his genealogy from the beginning of time.  And in the fullness of time from the entire Old Testament, Jesus “God saves” shows up to save his people from their sins.

In the first 2 chapters of Matthew, Jesus is:

Davis’s Son

Abraham’s son

Jesus – God saves

Immanuel “God is with us”

King of the Jews

Messiah

Leader

Shepherd-rule

What do I most need to read?  That He is everything on that list and more.

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Enough

The moment when you say to yourself  'enough is enough' and you get mad enough to do something about a dragging situation that is long overdue.

It could be anything such as eating better, getting out of debt, reading the Bible, spending more time with the family, making an overdue phone call, stepping out of the boat, dreaming big dreams and taking action.  And the problem is if we don't address it soon, the ramifications will be great and regret will continue to hunt us. Let's not waste another moment and do the thing. It's not easy but we are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses so let us throw off everything that hinders and run the race marked for us.

The time is now.

It requires sacrifice. Great sacrifice. A wake up call and I can't continue to sleep through and what if e act on the conviction and plead with God to help us.

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Who Am I? Really

My name is Myriam and I am …Fill in the blank.

This is how the AA (Alcoholic Anonymous) attendees introduce themselves and it’s been playing in my head. Not that I have been to any AA meetings but relying on what I have seen on TV.  But in a very similar fashion I carry a number of hidden labels spelled out in big letters written all over me.  You just don’t see until I let you in but they are there:

Fear

Shame

Insecure

Discontent

Afraid

Failure

Stupid

Good-for-nothing

People pleaser

I cannot trace the labels to their  origins but for quite some time, I have worked around many of them written all over me in BOLD letters.  Sure, I try to hide it well and one can hardly tell but they have weighed me down and I am getting tired of carrying them on my back.  Sometimes as in this season of life.

Every now and then I get a glimpse of what it’s like to shake them off and walk with my head high but far too often, it’s shortly lived only to add another label to the ever growing list.

My life verse is Galatians 5:1 –

  It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.

And

2 Cor 3:17 - …Where the Spirit of the Lord there is freedom.

Yoke of Slavery?  Yep.  I've lived in bondage for most of my life and the freedom in Christ at best seems to be an illusion.  And I whisper to myself: can I really be free? And I can hear a voice behind me saying:

 ‘yes you can.  The TRUTH will set you free”.  

 Ah the truth! After all, Jesus is the way, the TRUTH, and the life.

Mentally, I know that.  But deep down do I really believe that?  And that is the question before me.  Do I really believe God or just merely believe in God? How many times, I’ve silently said to myself that this applies to this or that person but for me, a cast-away, don’t even dare think about it. 

That raises another question – what is this voice in my head telling me who I am and it’s very boastful in convincing to just accept that c’est-la-vie?

Herein lies the solution.  I hear both voices and one is louder and quick to get me to settle down by putting more chains around my ankles and hands hereby building a massive stronghold around me.

Freedom is calling my name because God has redeemed my life from the slave market of sin.  I want to know why the enemy of my soul invests so much in tripping me up.  As I am concluding this post, this verse literally popped up in my head:

For the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel, has said:" You will be delivered by returning and resting; your strength will lie in quiet confidence. But you are not willing."  HCSB Isa 30:15.

Could this be my answer? 

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Here & There

ONCE upon a time, a very young girl had big dreams and big plans.  Plans to be become a wife and four children specifically two boys and two girls.  She kept herself for that special person that somehow will be the father of her four children.   She grew up in church but never heard the gospel.  She had knowledge of God totally based on fear that He is waiting to strike her down for not being ‘good’.    One can say that the relationship with God or lack thereof was based on God watching her every move. 

FAST forward over a decade later, her plans were still in motion.  She had met the man with whom she was going to leave happily ever after with.  They both agreed to keep themselves pure until marriage.   She left her homeland for a new country or better yet the Promised Land.   Her dream to become a doctor was looking bright – well others’ dreams for her.  She naturally chose a science major to pursue her medical degree.  Along the way, the prince charming with whom she was destined to spend her life with died in a car accident.   He was ready to propose to her and had gotten the ring but lo and behold the night before he died, they kissed each other and their last words were ‘I love you’.  

PLANS shattered.  Dreams died.  During her junior year decided it wasn't really her plan to become a doctor but everyone around thought that it was the right field for her because one can say learning comes easy and she was a straight A student.   But what should she do now?  What should she study now?  Any back up plans? 

NOPE.  Not one.  She’s been listening to other people and following their will and plans.

Fast Forward another five years.   She had a baby boy – out of wedlock.  That was not the life she planned for.  She was ashamed and embarrassed of being a single parent.  She didn't become a doctor.  She didn't marry her prince charming.  She never dreamed of raising a child by herself.  She withdrew from her friends and tried to run away to a whole different state.   Just maybe she might start over with a clean state with no one knowing her background, her failures, her fears and sort of start over.  She packed for Florida with a almost two month old baby boy in tow and headed south.

But God had a plan.  God has planned all along to meet her at her lowest.  Just a week after being in Orlando, she was invited to church and despite her many excuses for not going and one of which was she didn't belong in the house of God as a full time, full blown sinner and God was really going to hand her what she deserves.

IN that service, the pastor came forward and read Romans 7 and that deserves a post in itself.   In short, it’s as if she was in the sanctuary by herself with God and the reading from which Paul shares his struggles with sin and the law.  Finally, she thought ‘so someone understands me’ because the good she wanted to go she couldn't.  And Paul claimed that it was sin living in her but more importantly, he posed the question ‘Who will rescue me from this body of death?’ She thought to herself “I can be rescue”.   How?  And by whom?   Up to this point, the pastor was just reading the  passage and she was having a full blown conversation in her head with the Scriptures , and he went on to answer the question ‘thanks be God through Jesus Christ our Lord’.

THAT’S my story and I was ruined for Jesus from that point forward.  Yes I have blown over and over since but my life had meaning.  God loved me.  So much so that while I was living in serious sins for the first 26 years of my life, His Word said ‘while they were still sinners Christ died for us’.

Thank you Jesus.  I lay it all down for you.  While for many years, saying ‘all’ for you but in the back of my mind I didn’t really mean it because it meant loosing something or taking me to an unfamiliar place or doing something that will stretch me too far that I am willing.  At this moment, you can take it all.  Surrender everything if only to behold you. 

TO him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy— to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen.  Jude 24-25.

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All Things Work Together For My Good

     YESTERDAY brought the end of hours of commuting to the city.  An answer to a prayer.  No- an answer to many prayers and many others on my behalf. I literally begged and begged God almost daily to end it especially with the arrival of a new baby.  Thirteen years of commuting daily which added to a little over 15 hours a week.  He did it. Suddenly.  And so like Him, put me on the same street as my husband less than half a mile away.

Faithful.
                       Awesome.
                                                 Great.
                                                                     Perfect.  
                                             
Gracious are the very few words I can use to describe the overwhelming feeling from a heart flowing with thanksgiving.

     TODAY I start a new position one that the Lord made sure that I know I didn't get because of skills or experiences.  You see, I applied for the position online and received a call the next day to schedule an interview.  I had to take a test first as part of the hiring process.  I was warned that some people have taken as long as three hours to complete the test.  Upon my arrival for the test which was over 20 pages of questions -not multiple choice - essay like answers required.  I looked at it quickly to see which questions I could answer quickly. 

 One.  Just one answer that I knew with certainty.
     I thought of walking out of the conference room where I was.  After all, there was absolutely no way I was remotely going to get this position.  Two others have interviewed before me and surely they answered more than one question.  They are much better- I thought to myself.  It was fine because after all I still had a job.  The truth is the position involved much more than what I was doing where I was but capable of learning nonetheless. 

     AFTER wrestling for an hour -. I turned in the test thinking I didn't deserve an interview but the manager walked in and conducted the interview.  In all, I was there for over 3 hours.  I quickly called my husband to tell him jokingly that if I get called that God made sure I wouldn't be able to take an ounce of credit. 

     BUT they did call me less than an hour after leaving the place to start background check.  I was offered the position a few weeks later. I was stunned.  Amazed.  Nothing short of the favor of the Lord.

     IT is so worth documenting, dear Lord, lest I forget your faithfulness and mercy in the land of the leaving.

     IN answering this specific prayer, He opens the door to have family devotion in the morning. 

To be continued.

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Let's Try This Again

Another attempt to chronicle my journey with My Saviour.  I waved goodbye to 2012 with a heart filled with gratitude to the God of the Universe.   With the arrival of another bundle of joy that although longed for didn't expect to come to fruition.

I will continue to praise and thank you for a second boy. 

A book called No Ordinary Child among many others that has helped tremendously in being a much better parent and here's a very telling quote:

I’m sobered and grieved over the condition of children in America and in other parts of the 

world. I bear this grief in my heart night and day. I can’t walk past strangers pushing strollers without  becoming stirred as I ponder the life that sits in that baby carriage.  I’m moved as I consider the absolute dynamite awaiting detonation in that little person. I see the world-changer who lives inside every frame. I want this vision to beat in your heart, too. I long for us to pray fervently for our children because we realize our mechanical religious gestures will not ignite their explosive potential.  If our prayer is a blasé: “Oh God, bless the kids,” then we might as well cross our fingers or buy a lucky charm.

Motherhood has taken a whole new meaning for me as God has continued to teach me about the meaning of what a true biblical woman is.  I am just in the beginning and the middle of it with a 7 month old and a soon-to-be freshman in high school.  As I spent the last few months immersed in books and teachings about the true meaning of womanhood - sobering indeed as I feel that I have missed the mark by a long shot, this How God Overcomes Failures in Four Family message, from True Woman conference, brought me some sense of hope.  And I continue to hold to the promises that He's able to redeem the times the locusts have stolen.

Promises.  Yes - they are all over the Holy Book and my dear bloggy friend A Free Spirit Butterfly  whom I admired so much has decided to keep a list of His promises that we find in Holy Writ.  Thank you so much sweet thing for joining me in this journey. Can't wait to meet you in 2013 and give you a great hug.

Started a 21 fast with my church today and I am excited to see what God will do.

Amazed that God heard my cry to leave the city and 3.5 hours of daily commute and reduce to 30 minutes round trip with a new job that I will start in  a few days.  I don't deserve such grace and mercy. My heart overflows with thanksgiving.  This song says it all 'Endless Hallelujah" by Matt Redman.

Dealing with diabetes diagnosis at the end of 2012- it runs in my family and I have made drastic changes to reduce the many negative effects.  

I have decided to join the The Romans Project in memorizing 3 chapters from the book of Romans and I literally sat in the car and asked for the capacity to do it.  I need to but by God's grace alone. 

Last note, I am enjoying the following books:

 Anything by Jennie Allen 

               and 

7:An experimental Mutiny Against Excess by Jen Hatmaker. 

Be glorified Lord!

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